Dazed and Confused
by ttate-langdon
Summary: When Regulus Black stumbles upon a stoned Julie Potter, he is not happy. Not until he smokes his first joint. They talk about the impending war, dying, and... a few other colourful subjects. RATED FOR DRUG USE, LANGUAGE, AND MENTIONS OF SEX.


Regulus Black was a very private person. He liked his space, quiet places to relax and ignore the blithering idiots that he hung out with. During the summer he hung a sign on his bedroom door. "Do Not Enter Without the Express Permission of Regulus Arcturus Black", it read.

This is the reason why Regulus was very angry when he stumbled upon the Potter girl in _his_ classroom late afternoon on a Wednesday. _His_ classroom. That he used for free periods on Wednesdays and Mondays. It was empty and unused otherwise. He gritted his teeth. Merlin, could he not get peace anywhere?

Sitting against the wall of that empty classroom, was the Potter girl. _Julie_. He examined her for a moment. Her bleached head was bowed, falling over her face as she read a book and lifted her knees to her chest. She held a joint in her hand, occasionally lifting it to her red lips and taking drags from it.

Regulus cleared his throat. Julie looked up from her book, setting it down on the floor_. _Probably some muggle book. She probably liked feeling 'well cultured' and 'literate' for her age. _Merlin_, _how pretentious._

Julie looked him up and down, taking a drag of her joint. Her heavy lidded eyes stared at him, waiting for him to say something, as she pulled her school cardigan over her shoulders. "Yes, Black?"

"I-What... What are you doing in here?" Regulus demanded, eyebrows knitting together. He watched, outraged, as she folded her arms neatly.

"What does it look like?" She asked coolly. He stood in front of her, hands clenched in his trouser pockets. "I'm reading."

"In _my _classroom." Regulus noted, gritting his teeth. "Smoking _spliff." _

Julie chuckled, her deep, sultry voice echoing in the small classroom. _She was laughing at him. _He felt his cheeks turn pink at this.

"Well?" He hissed at her, only annoyed by how calm she was in his presence.

"_Well_, this isn't _your _classroom." Julie gave a lopsided smirk, taking another drag from her joint. "Unless you're a Professor now?"

Regulus rolled his eyes at her. "Actually, this is my classroom. So I'd appreciate it if -"

Julie interrupted him. "If you're a Professor, then by all means, kick me out of _your_ classroom." She insisted sarcastically, picking her book and beginning to read again.

"Of course you'd have to punish me, for being a _naughty _girl and smoking weed in your class." Julie put unneeded emphasis on the word _naughty_, smirking slightly and not bothering to look up from her book. She was clearly trying to annoy Regulus, and it was working.

Regulus blushed even more at her words, guessing that he looked like a tomato. "Just get out, will you?" He said, exasperatedly.

"Nope." Julie said, turning the page of her book.

Regulus groaned. _Fucking hell, _he didn't remember her being like this last year. They shared double potions together, and they were both in the Slug Club. Why Professor Slughorn let Gryffindors into his club, he had no idea. The man was a blithering idiot anyway.

Defeated, he slumped down beside her. Taking the dope away from the grasp of her dainty hand, and taking a drag. Julie smirked again into her book; normally she would have cringed away if a Slytherin had sat beside her and stole her joint, but fuck it. She was high as fuck.

Regulus took the smoke into his mouth and then blew it out quickly. He couldn't believe he was sitting doing such a common thing. But, sitting in an empty classroom with Potter, smoking a joint

"You're supposed to inhale it, stupid." Julie took the joint away from him, shaking her head. "Watch."

Regulus watched as she inhaled the smoke deeply, then closed her eyes and blew it back out again. He ran a hand through his dark hair, taking the joint back from her.

Ten minutes later, Julie had gotten Reg successfully baked. She watched him, eyes red and hair messy, as the sunlight hit him. Julie thought that he looked pretty happy. He wasn't smiling or anything, but it was just the way he looked, you know?

Regulus loosened his tie, leaning back against the wall. _Dammit, that stuff was good. _

**The War**

"Yanno what I hate most about this stuff that's going on?" Julie asked, smoke curling out of her mouth as she spoke. Regulus squinted at her, because it felt like the room was spinning.

"Wassat?"

"No one, _no one_ here is nice anymore." Julie said passionately, wafting her index finger in the air.

"Yeah, people suck." Regulus agreed, nodding his head. He rolled up his shirt sleeves.

"Am I bein' too precious, or are the folk here just _pointless?"_ She asked, tucking a stray strand of blonde hair behind her ear.

"Pointless." Reg concurred.

**Blanket Fort Friday**

"No way." Regulus giggled, and brought the joint to his pink lips. "You do not!"

Julie nodded. "Every Friday in the Hufflepuff common room. It's like a big pyjama party, with pot and Firewhiskey."

"Really?"

"Yup. I can't believe you never come."

"Fuck, I spend too much time dorm."

**The Black Sisters**

"Passive aggressive!" Julie slammed her palm on the wood flooring. "I'm so sick of their passive aggressive bullshit!"

"They aren't that bad!" Regulus defended his cousins, even though he knew Julie was right. They were bitches. At least Bella and Narcissa were.

Julie rolled her eyes and pulled a crazy face. "Get outa 'Ogwarts muggle scum! My name's Narcissa and I love Malfoy's cock! Blud purity, yeeaaaah!'"

Reg only blinked at her through heavy lids. "Feel better?"

"Fuck you Black."

**Sex**

"Tha's for me to know and you to never find out." Julie tapped her nose knowingly.

"So you're a virgin, then?" Regulus laughed.

"No!"

"So who is this imaginary guy then?"

Julie shrugged her petite shoulders. "'E was Irish."

"Makes sense." Reg nodded. "Irish are always the filthiest."

"Pahh!" Julie snorted. "And how would you know this?"

"Got off with an Irish girl once." Regulus grinned. "She was _proper _filthy."

Julie rolled her eyes. "And what did this girl do that was so filthy?"

"Well, um..." He stumbled, mouth hanging open. "I fingered her."

Julie raised an eyebrow. "And...?"

"And she..." Regulus licked his lips. "She shat down my arm."

"You're a fucking freak."

**Sirius**

Julie threw her arms in the air. "Dude, I swear! That's the only logical explanation!"

Reg sniggered again, and rolled his eyes. "Tha's your logical explanation?"

"The. Only. One."

"Lupin is gay?"

"Yup! Tha's it."

**First Years**

"You know I love the little scared looks on their faces." Cali sighed, rolling another joint. "But they're only 12. I mean, they can't expect the rest of the world to take care of them. Especially now there's a war going on."

"Harsh, Potter. Harsh."

"What?" Julie leaned back against the wall. "If there wasn't a war going on, and they ran their mouths off about the Ministry or wandered the castle after hours, they'd get a slap on the wrist. Now? Shit, paying attention is the only fucking thing we got."

**Love**

"Yeah, it isn't real."Julie shook her head, and looked over at Reg.

He snorted and rolled his eyes. "It's love, Potter. Not _Babbity Rabbity and the Cackling Stump_."

"It ain't real." Julie insisted. "I'm telling you, it ain't real."

**Fear**

"All the time!" Reg growled, and he snatched the joint from Julie's hand. "We're shit scared all the time!" Julie tilted her head. Merlin, she never knew that Slytherins were scared by the war too.

"We're gonna die some point. Maybe You Know Who will kill all of us." Julie wondered. "Maybe when we die, we won't be scared."

"But what happens after that, huh?"

"A full night's sleep?"

"… That's almost worth it."

"Couldn't agree more."

**Dying**

"You scared to die yet?"

"Nah, I don't think so."

"How come?" Reg asked.

"It's just like falling asleep, I reckon."

**Sirius**

"HE'S A FUCKING WHORE!"

**Lily Evans**

"Scares you?" Regulus threw his head back and laughed. She was scared of the mudblood!

"It's not funny Black. She's terrifying."

**Music**

"The Smiths, man. Don't tell me you've never listened to The Smiths."

Regulus shook his head. "Muggle music?"

"How can you live in the 70's and not listen to The Smiths! And Aerosmith... and... And Pink Floyd!" She rambled.

"It's for _muggles_."

"Ohmymerlin." Julie pinched her nose. "Just promise you'll give it a try?"

"Can't promise that, I'm afraid."

**Death Eaters**

"I don't know man." Reg said, running a hand through his messy hair. "They're about as common as the damn flies in my house, yet each time I see one, they're the fucking weirdest thing I've ever seen."

"I've never seen one." Julie shrugged her shoulders. "Except in the Prophet."

"You're lucky, Potter."

**Being Human**

"Shit, there's no way I can go to my next class like this." Reg murmured.

"Same." Julie nodded, rubbing her forehead. She stood up, shoving her tin of pot and book into her bag.

Reg stood, rubbing the back of his neck. "Thanks for the weed, Potter."

"Anytime, Black." Julie smiled, leaning against the doorframe.

"Is that an offer?" He smirked, watching her.

"Might be." She shrugged nonchalantly.

"So, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?" Julie frowned. "What's tomorrow?"

"Uh, the Slug Club?" Reg reminded her.

"Oh right." Julie nodded before turning and walking out of the door. She stopped and turned on her heel. Regulus watched her, raising an eyebrow.

"Does this mean I'm your Dealer now, Black?"

"Goodbye, Potter." Regulus smirked, rolling his eyes.


End file.
